Your Guide to the Sexual Response Cycle

The sexual response cycle refers to the sequence of physical and emotional changes that occur as a person becomes sexually aroused and participates in sexually stimulating activities, including intercourse and masturbation. Knowing how your body responds during each phase of the cycle can enhance your relationship and help you pinpoint the cause of any sexual problems.

What Are the Phases of the Sexual Response Cycle?

The sexual response cycle has four phases: excitement, plateau, orgasm, and resolution. Both men and women experience these phases, although the timing usually is different. For example, it is unlikely that both partners will reach orgasm at the same time. In addition, the intensity of the response and the time spent in each phase varies from person to person. Understanding these differences may help partners better understand one another's bodies and responses, and enhance the sexual experience.

Phase 1: Excitement

General characteristics of the excitement phase, which can last from a few minutes to several hours, include the following:

• Muscle tension increases.
• Heart rate quickens and breathing is accelerated.
• Skin may become flushed (blotches of redness appear on the chest and back).
• Nipples become hardened or erect.
• Blood flow to the genitals increases, resulting in swelling of the woman's clitoris and labia minora (inner lips), and erection of the man's penis.
• Vaginal lubrication begins.
• The woman's breasts become fuller and the vaginal walls begin to swell.
• The man's testicles swell, his scrotum tightens, and he begins secreting a lubricating liquid.

Phase 2: Plateau

General characteristics of the plateau phase, which extends to the brink of orgasm, include the following:

• The changes begun in phase 1 are intensified.
• The vagina continues to swell from increased blood flow, and the vaginal walls turn a dark purple.
• The woman's clitoris becomes highly sensitive (may even be painful to touch) and retracts under the clitoral hood to avoid direct stimulation from the penis.
• The man's testicles are withdrawn up into the scrotum.
• Breathing, heart rate, and blood pressure continue to increase.
• Muscle spasms may begin in the feet, face, and hands.
• Muscle tension increases.

Phase 3: Orgasm

The orgasm is the climax of the sexual response cycle. It is the shortest of the phases and generally lasts only a few seconds. General characteristics of this phase include the following:

• Involuntary muscle contractions begin.
• Blood pressure, heart rate, and breathing are at their highest rates, with a rapid intake of oxygen.
• Muscles in the feet spasm.
• There is a sudden, forceful release of sexual tension.
• In women, the muscles of the vagina contract. The uterus also undergoes rhythmic contractions.
• In men, rhythmic contractions of the muscles at the base of the penis result in the ejaculation of semen.
• A rash, or "sex flush" may appear over the entire body.

Phase 4: Resolution

During resolution, the body slowly returns to its normal level of functioning, and swelled and erect body parts return to their previous size and color. This phase is marked by a general sense of well-being, enhanced intimacy and, often, fatigue. Some women are capable of a rapid return to the orgasm phase with further sexual stimulation and may experience multiple orgasms. Men need recovery time after orgasm, called a refractory period, during which they cannot reach orgasm again. The duration of the refractory period varies among men and usually lengthens with advancing age.

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Lost Your Sex Drive?

Lost Your Sex Drive?

Top libido busters, from medical conditions to stress, could be causing your lowered sex drive.

By Matt McMillen
WebMD the Magazine - Feature

Reviewed by Louanne Cole Weston, PhD

Sometimes you can't when you want to. Sometimes you want to when you can't. Sex drive killers come in all guises. They strike men and women, young and old. They can target your brain and your body. For Bonne Oliverio, a retired information specialist who lives just outside Cleveland, the drugs she takes for multiple sclerosis cause vaginal dryness, a real anti-aphrodisiac.

"For 45 years, I've had a really good, solid marriage, especially sexually," says Oliverio, 65, who was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis about 15 years ago. "But the medication and pain really interfere with our sex life."

Causes of Libido Loss

Medications that often drag down your sex drive include antidepressants and blood pressure medications, antihistamines and -- ironically -- oral contraceptives. But meds are just one of a myriad of libido busters. Other common culprits include:
Erectile dysfunction. ED might not cause a drop in your sex drive, but worrying about it sure can. (Try Forever Yours and a Ringo)
Menopause. Hormonal changes can make sex painful, but don't ignore the other related causes that can sap your sex drive. Low self-esteem and body image blues are big turnoffs. (Try Slick & Silly, it's a great water-based lubricant)
Depression. A vicious cycle, depression can cause your sex drive to dip precipitously, and that drop-off can further fuel your depression.
Stress. Worrying and wooing do not mix. Stress keeps you from focusing on your partner -- and your pleasure -- and saps the energy you need to perform.
Alcohol. You may feel like Don Juan after a couple of drinks, but alcohol can leave you feeling numb just when you need to be aroused.

Other causes include sleeplessness, lack of intimacy, obesity -- we could go on. Sex drive killers are legion, after all. Rare, though, are doctors who ask their patients about their sex lives.  "Doctors are just not good at asking about it, even gynecologists," says Carolyn Nemec, MD, a family physician who specializes in female sexual dysfunction and sexual medicine at the Cleveland Clinic.  Nemec has been Oliverio's physician for the past two years. Their initial conversation led to a treatment -- an estrogen ring that reduces dryness -- that has helped Oliverio get her groove back. In fact, successful treatments exist for many causes of low libido, if only you and your doctor talk about it.  But, says Nemec, "One study found that doctors asked about their patients' sex lives only 5% to 10% of the time. We need to do better. People are suffering and we aren't asking."

How to Increase Your Libido

Check out these three tips to help keep your sex drive from getting stuck in neutral.

Technique matters. "Know your body and how it works," says Carolyn Nemec, MD. "We can pick up a cookbook, so why can't we pick up a sex book?" (www.partygalsbykaren.biz)
Take care of your ticker. "Cholesterol, anything that affects the heart, that reduces blood flow, affects sex," Nemec says. "And people who exercise have more and better sex."
Get tested. Hormone imbalances can cause trouble for men and women, Nemec says. Ask your doctor to see how your levels measure up.

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Good Health & Sex

You don't need to be model-thin to have a wonderful sex life, but if you're uncomfortable with your weight, you may not be at your best in the bedroom for a few reasons.
"Being overweight may deflate your libido, especially if you don't feel attractive," says Kleiner.
Extra body fat raises the specter of elevated blood glucose levels that can damage the blood vessels and nerves that allow for arousal and sexual pleasure.  It also increases the risk for high blood pressure and clogged arteries.

Clear, flexible arteries allow maximum blood flow to all the right places during sex, enhancing your pleasure.
A balanced diet rich in whole grains, fruits, vegetables, legumes, and other lean protein foods helps to control your blood pressure, blood cholesterol levels, and your weight. But don't cut too many calories.

According to Reichman, upon menopause, women lose 90% of their circulating estrogen, which may result in less blood flowing to the genitals and diminished capacity for arousal.  Body fat offers some protection, because, like your ovaries, it produces estrogen.

Whatever your weight, exercise may help to ignite your love life by improving circulation, managing blood pressure, increasing energy levels, and helping you to look better, which can have a positive effect on your sex life.  (Try our Party Gals Pole! It's a 2-4-1 because it get you in shape and helps you feel sexy!)

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The Couple that Eats Together, Sleeps Together?

If you enjoy foods with a reputation for making you hot to trot, you may be thinking about whipping up meals that will knock your socks off, and your partner's. "A delicious meal can be a prelude to sex," Kleiner says.
The act of cooking together can be a form of foreplay, and the smell of food can ignite intimacy, too.
According to Greaves, research has shown that the aroma of pumpkin pie, cheese pizza, and buttered popcorn induced blood flow to the penis, and the combination of pumpkin pie and lavender did the best job.  Women, on the other hand, responded to a combination of Good & Plenty and cucumber.
The smell of vanilla is particularly alluring.  "Add vanilla extract to whole grain French toast or drop a vanilla bean into your champagne," she recommends. (Try Party Gals Seduction Body Dew in Vanilla) If you're not interested in any of the foods with a reputation for enhancing your love life, are you doomed to a lust-free existence? Not at all.

What matters most is that you and your partner dine on meals that include foods that you both enjoy, as long as you don't overeat or drink yourself into a stupor, Kleiner says. She puts it this way: "What you eat on a daily basis is far more important to overall sexual satisfaction that a single meal."

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Aphrodisiacs for a Spicer Sex Life

Sexually Suggestive Fruits and Vegetables

Some people find produce erotic. Bananas, asparagus, cucumbers and carrots speak for themselves on that score.
Avocados, Greaves says, were prized by the Aztecs, who called them "testicle trees" because they grow in pairs. Ancient Greeks and Romans feasted on figs to promote potency.  And let's not forget pomegranates, also known as "love apples."
Those ancient civilizations were on to something. Fruits and vegetables are loaded with vitamins and minerals required to produce sex hormones necessary for sexual arousal and pleasure.

Honey

Ever wonder where the term "honeymoon" came from?
Centuries ago, newlyweds in Europe drank honey wine during the first month of marriage to improve their sexual stamina. As a bonus, the long-ago lovebirds also got small amounts of beneficial vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants from honey.

Chocolate

The Aztec emperor Montezuma's chocolate consumption is legendary. Rumor has it that he drank 50 glasses of honey-sweetened chocolate a day in the name of virility.
Perhaps Montezuma valued chocolate for its feel-good qualities, too.  Cocoa beans contain phenylethamine, a compound that triggers the release of endorphins, compounds associated with pleasure.
Nowadays, cocoa powder processed without alkaline provides the biggest bang for the buck. It contains the highest levels of the antioxidants associated with lower blood cholesterol levels, reduced inflammation in blood vessels, and maximum blood flow. Darker chocolate contains more cocoa powder.

Oysters

Oysters are dripping with dopamine, a compound that stirs feelings of sexual desire, and pleasure. These mollusks are also bursting with zinc, a mineral that fosters the production of testosterone, necessary for arousal and pleasure in men and women.
You may need to resist the temptation to ply your paramour with raw oysters - your romantic interlude could end with a severe case of food poisoning. Most raw oysters in the U.S. carry a bacterium called Vibrio vulnificus.  Healthy people are unlikely to have adverse affects from eating raw oysters, but those with diabetes, liver disease, immune systems disorders, and other chronic diseases can end up with a severe infection that may be fatal.

Salmon

You can't get down when you're uptight. Eating salmon can help brighten your disposition.
"Salmon harbors an abundance of omega-3 fats, which qualifies it as a natural mood booster," says Susan Kleiner, PhD, RD, author of The Good Mood Diet: Feel Great While You Lose Weight.
Salmon also supplies large amounts of vitamin D.  Researchers at the University of Toronto have found that vitamin D appears to work in the brain like many antidepressant medications do: by raising levels of serotonin, a neurotransmitter that induces feelings of calm and banishes bad moods.

Garlic

Rich in antioxidants that protect against cell damage, garlic is said to stir sexual desire and increase blood flow, says Greaves.
Just be sure to eat as much as your bed partner, as the effects of garlic can linger on your breath for hours.

Alcohol

Nothing says seduction like popping the cork on the best bottle of bubbly money can buy, if that's what you enjoy.
A drink a day may help reduce the risk of heart disease in healthy people, but more than that may turn your tryst into a snooze fest.
Alcohol is a central nervous system downer.  Chronic drinking is linked to erectile dysfunction, which will put a damper on lovemaking.

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